Forget Lipstick: The Hosiery Index Is On The Rise

By A Mystery Man Writer

Who knew a pair of tights could predict just how bad this financial crisis will get? You guys may have heard of the Lipstick Index, an intriguing (and surprisingly well-substantiated) economic theory that says there's a direct relation between rising sales in tubes of lipstick and a falling financial market--the more the economy stinks, the more women indulge in small purchases, like $10 tubes of lip lacquer. But with this financial crisis, it seems we gals are opting instead for inexpensive hosiery purchases.
Who knew a pair of tights could predict just how bad this financial crisis will get? You guys may have heard of the Lipstick Index, an intriguing (and surprisingly well-substantiated) economic theory that says there's a direct relation between rising sales in tubes of lipstick and a falling financial market--the more the economy stinks, the more women indulge in small purchases, like $10 tubes of lip lacquer. But with this financial crisis, it seems we gals are opting instead for inexpensive hosiery purchases.